Turtle Mitch finally coming out!!

It has been suspected that he is a turtle for quite along time.

In a surprise announcement this morning, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell made a startling revelation: he is, in fact, a turtle.

The news came as a shock to many, as the 78-year-old Kentucky Senator has been widely regarded as a powerful and influential figure in U.S. politics. But McConnell says he has been hiding his true identity all these years.

“I’m proud to finally come out and share who I really am,” McConnell said in a statement. “I’m a turtle, and I’ve been living inside a hard shell of lies and deception for far too long. It’s time for me to embrace my true form and reveal my true self to the world.”

McConnell’s admission has been met with both confusion and amazement. Some have speculated that the Senator’s slow and methodical approach to policy-making was a sign of his true nature all along. Others have joked that McConnell’s newfound identity could be the key to unlocking the mysteries of Washington gridlock.

When asked about his plans for the future, McConnell was quick to point out that he was looking forward to continuing his work in the Senate.

“I’m a turtle, but I’m still a politician,” he said. “And I’ll keep fighting for the people of Kentucky and for the issues that matter most to them.”

McConnell also took the opportunity to address any potential criticism of his decision to come out as a turtle.

“I know some people might think it’s silly or strange, but I think it’s important to be honest about who you are and to be proud of it,” he said. “At the end of the day, I’m still Mitch McConnell. I’m just a turtle now.”